Filed under: craziness, divorce, life, random | Tags: divorce, random, things that make you go hmm.
So I have been neglecting being me for a while. My bad I have missed my random craziness and I would like to say that I am back.
1st I realized that if ohm is in another state I am quite happy. Yes I need to move or that rat bastard needs to be deported. Whatever comes first would
make me happy.
2nd I really need to get laid and have been thinking about picking up guys lately. Not sure about the whole
Picking up guys but getting laid definitely. It would be about a year since I had sex and that is very very depressing. I am going to have cobwebs soon. I am too young for that. I don’t want a relationship just sex. Is that really too much to ask for? I think not, but I probably need to go out and meet guys instead of bitching about it on this here blog. Yep go out more! Hmmm, hard to do with a 2 year old.
3rd I am teaching my 2 year how to be crazy. Epic lightsaber battles, nerd gun wars and so forth. And the girls, well actually women, i work with think I am a complete nut. I hope that pumps is always true to himself and knows how to have fun. I hope I can at least teach him that.
4th I have seen 2 “little people” at my work in 2 days. I love “little people” they just seem so cool. I know they probably hate it, but you need to play the hand dealt to you and they seem to do a fab job at it. Props, mad props to all the little peeps in the world!
5th I have decided it is very complicated getting a divorce. I need the past year in paycheck stubs, 3 years of tax returns and all kinds of other crazy shit that I have no idea want it actually is. Thank god I have a lawyer to tell me what they need. and yes I have spent 1 hour tonight getting all that crap together to do a mad fax to them tomorrow. I didn’t even do
The work I needed to for tomorrow because in my head list of things to do DIVORCE is number 1.
5.1th divorce is a funny looking word. And no I have not been drinking imam just being me.
6th I am throwing myself a divorce party when it is all done. Mmm went to this bachelorette party and there was this stripper with tricks. I need to see the tricks. So I am have a divorce party with strippers. I can’t wait. Kas said she didn’t want to see strippers but she has to, I take no answer but you are coming and having a great time. I need my bffs by my side.
7th I need to sleep. Later hater
1.Where do men put their change at night? And do they get it again the next day to spend?
2.And why do people think it necessary to post everything they do on facebook? Really, get a life.
3.Why do people use the expression “have field day”?
4.Why do teenagers flock to malls? Do they not have anything better to do? As a teenager I did not hang out in a mall. I hung out at the awesome local waffle house. You could smoke in there.
5.Why are yawns contagious?
6.Why do women wear heels? I know they are sexy and everything but damn they kill my feet.
7.Why do people act like nobody is watching them? Yes you look weird.
8.Why do big men drive little vespas?
9.Do I look like someone who wants to talk to you? I don’t think so.
10.Why are weekends only 2 days and work weeks 5 days? Shouldn’t be the other way around?
11.Why do we pay so much in insurance every year just to have to meet a really big deductible?
12.And how the he’ll do people really live? I can never make enough money to stay a float.
13. Why are gas prices going up again?
14. Why is wine sooooo goood?
15. Why can a 2 year old make my day everyday?
16. Again do I look like someone who wants to talk to you? Really.
17. Why do people think it is cool to play games and do stupid ass sh*t on facebook? Get a damn life and no I don’t what to splash you I have better things to do. I think I need to cancel my facebook account.
18. Why do people always consider michealanglo’s Sistine chapel perfection? hehating painting and only wanted the carve the pope’s tomb. And it is far from perfect.
19. Why in the world would you have 5 wedding showers? You have been living on your own for years what could you possibly need? And let’s not replace all the old with all new, let recycle and protect our world.
20. Why is chocolate bark the greatest sweet treat ever?
